# Coach De Bruyns > Celebrating Masculinity ## Posts - [Physical Training in Ramadan](https://coachdebruyns.com/physical-training-in-ramadan/): Ramadan is the ninth month in the Islamic Calendar and is actually the name of the month just like September is the name of a month. Muslims all around the world fast during this month by abstaining from food, drink and sex during daylight hours. In the early hours of the morning, before sunrise, they […] - [A New World](https://coachdebruyns.com/a-new-world/): Exactly a year ago I was in quarantine for roughly three months. I experienced a life of complete and total isolation where I worked from home online and lived by myself alone in an apartment. My life alternated between work, exercise, cooking, cleaning and praying. It was a unique experience for me to experience Ramadan […] - [How to choose a good wife](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-to-choose-a-good-wife/): Men the world over, are increasingly discouraged from getting married. Why get married when the majority of marriages end in divorce? Why get married when so many women leave their husbands when least expected to? In response these questions I will attempt not only to explain to men why they should get married, but also […] - [The Middle Road](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-middle-road/): Choice! There was a time when people had to choose between watching channel one or channel two on their television sets. As a kid we’d play cricket, rugby or soccer. Occasionally we’d play some other games. When it came to ice-cream, it was either chocolate, strawberry or vanilla. In a world with little variables it […] - [Between complacency and ambition](https://coachdebruyns.com/between-complacency-and-ambition/): “Failure is not an option…come on son… push harder..” This kind of talk works well in the gym. A lot of the motivational books out there try to tap into this hunger for attaining success. “Ask yourself, how badly do you want it. Imagine it, feel it, touch it, savor it… Now get to work!” […] - [Do women want to be protected?](https://coachdebruyns.com/do-women-want-to-be-protected/): … tell men that we women want to feel protected and wanted too... of course this is just me... but my girlfriends said the same thing. Usually none of us have financial security and we rely on the protection/security aspect and we just want to feel wanted. - [Being Authentic](https://coachdebruyns.com/being-authentic/): The distance between knowledge and ignorance is the extent to which you are able to admit things to yourself. - [Finding Peace in Relationships](https://coachdebruyns.com/finding-peace-in-relationships/):   We try to find peace in our lives in various ways. Some of us look for peace in our families, others in our hobbies. Some of us are at peace when we pray, others when we are outdoors in nature. Some use various activities to help them escape from a turbulent reality- one that […] - ["I'm in the process of starting a new business..."](https://coachdebruyns.com/im-in-the-process-of-starting-a-new-business/): “I am in the process of starting a new business…. I seem apprehensive about it.” It’s tough to get a business off the group. If you’ve ever been there and decided to close shop, you will naturally find yourself a bit hesitant to go there again. Some of the struggles in your previous business might […] - [Naming](https://coachdebruyns.com/naming/): The art of naming, I am led to believe, is primarily a human trait. The revelation I read and try to follow, the Qur’an, talks about how God taught Adam the names of all things. (2:118)  Naming is a very big deal because it is the foundation of a vocabulary and as a result, the […] - [Should I get a university degree?](https://coachdebruyns.com/should-i-get-a-university-degree/): If you want to be a doctor, a lawyer or an engineer you will need a solid qualification just to be allowed into the industry- and for good reason. - [I can’t get a man to commit...](https://coachdebruyns.com/i-cant-get-a-man-to-commit/): Every so often a woman shows up and says, “I just can’t find a man who will commit…” There are certain things about a lot of men that a lot of times go unnoticed in a world that is increasingly unwilling to acknowledge anything masculine. Hopefully, you want a man to commit out of his […] - [Can you help me find a woman?](https://coachdebruyns.com/can-you-help-me-find-a-woman/): Every so often I get someone asking me this question: How do you find a woman? Firstly, I must say that this is a bit vague so I’ll rephrase the question into two questions and answer both. Hopefully you guys will find it helpful. How do you find  a woman to sleep with? How do […] - [The Life Within](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-life-within/): There are days when everything seems to be going wrong. Sometimes it feels like life is spinning out of control and you don’t know whether you’re coming or going. Chaos isn’t something you can predict, except maybe that it’s bound to visit you now and again. Even the most organized of people get thrown wild […] - [Why don’t men like counselling?](https://coachdebruyns.com/why-dont-men-like-counselling/): I’ve had countless women come to me for help asking me to please talk to their husbands about the duties their husbands ought to perform. I, in most cases, never conceded to that. I never have a discussion with a man about his wife, unless he comes to me himself and asks me for advice. […] - [I’m 35 years old and I’d like to do a Martial Art for self-defense. Which one should I do?](https://coachdebruyns.com/martial-arts-for-self-defence/): Martial Arts are of various types and don’t all have the same focus points. All Martial Arts are not equal when it comes to self defence. There are literally hundreds of different styles and with Mixed Martial Arts on the scene we’ve more or less experienced which Martial Arts are best for unarmed combat. However, […] - [How do I put on some muscle mass?](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-do-i-put-on-some-muscle-mass/): This is a great question and while I am not a professional athlete I have myself went up from 66kg to 75kg through diet and weight training over the span of a year. I’ve lost belly fat and gained muscle and if I could do that at 36 years of age while having a fulltime […] - [I don’t know what she wants…](https://coachdebruyns.com/i-dont-know-what-she-wants/): what she says she wants, it more often than not, doesn’t get a positive reaction out of her. What do women typically want in a man? - [I don’t know what he wants…](https://coachdebruyns.com/i-dont-know-what-he-wants/): There was a time people made certain basic assumptions about men and what they want in an intimate relationship. In fact, many people still have these basic assumptions: sex, food, comfort, and to be left alone. That’s a very short list and for a lot of men, keeping things as uncomplicated as possible is very […] - [Pleasure Seeking](https://coachdebruyns.com/pleasure-seeking/): When I was growing up I veered towards asceticism and had this idea that seeking pleasure was spiritually damning. I got that idea, not only from Islamic asceticism but also from my reading of the Far-Eastern Traditions. My journey into Martial Arts led me down the rabbit role of spiritualism and for many years I […] - [Understanding Cultural Nuance](https://coachdebruyns.com/335-2/): In a diverse world where you might be in conversation with people from all around the globe, it’s hard not to misunderstand what the other person means. That is because, historically, we typically only spoke to people around us. We shared a common language and common experience. In today’s world we need to have a […] - [Relationship Advice for Guys](https://coachdebruyns.com/relationship-advice-for-guys/): A lot of the posts out there are focused on how you can get a woman. There’s so much focus on game, which is basically just a bunch of cheap tactics to bed women, and almost zero focus on what to do when you actually have a partner / wife that you’d like to remain […] - [Time Management](https://coachdebruyns.com/time-management/): The world we live in is not like the world our parents lived in. We have the internet, social media, YouTube and so many other things we can spend a lot of our time on. Some people report spending in excess of six hours a day on their phones. Those aren’t six hours of being […] - [Be contented not complacent](https://coachdebruyns.com/be-contented-not-complacent/): A person once told me, “Ambition is what kills you. You are never contented with what you have…” I thought about that for a while. It was true that I was always trying to improve my life, and I was never ‘satisfied’ with what I have. It was never good enough. I always wanted the […] - [Starting a Business?](https://coachdebruyns.com/starting-a-business/): I’ve met with scores of people over the years, either running their own businesses or starting up. I had that rare privilege because I owned the local Internet cafe in my little village called Strandfontein. ‘Strand’ means beach in Afrikaans and many places ended with ‘fontein’ at the end to represent ‘village/ spring.’ I also […] - [How to Lose Weight](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-to-lose-weight/): I’ve seen a few good friends of mine battle with losing weight. I’ve coached some of them into losing weight through exercise and diet only to find that several months after reaching their weight goals they’ve returned back to their old habits. One of the biggest problems with being overweight is not being able to […] - [Why can't a woman be more like a man?](https://coachdebruyns.com/why-cant-a-woman-be-more-like-a-man/): I watched a video from the movie ‘My Fair Lady’ made in 1964. Naturally that was before the world grew wiser and ‘toxic masculinity’ became a go to phrase. I added the video in this blog. “Why can’t a woman be more like man?” An interesting question indeed. In fact, it’s probably at the heart […] - [Core Beliefs](https://coachdebruyns.com/core-beliefs/): When beliefs are mentioned religion often comes to mind. What do you believe? Think about that for a minute… Some people might reply, “Well, I believe in God.” Others might respond, “I’m not sure what I believe.” I’ve heard people say, “I believe in freedom.” There’s really no right way to believe. I know that […] - [Money Matters](https://coachdebruyns.com/money-matters/): Money is a strange thing. People do a lot for money. Some people will do anything for money. In some circles they believe that everyone has a price. The most dangerous person, according to those guys, is someone who doesn’t. Then there’s those righteous folks who go around saying, “money is the root to all […] - [Smile](https://coachdebruyns.com/smile/): I was walking down the street deep in thought. That’s my normal state of affairs. I’m always deep in thought. I’ve struggled with being fully present most of my life, because I often get lost in the world ideas. On one such day, looking down as usual, a kid looked up at me and shot […] - [What’s my calling?](https://coachdebruyns.com/whats-my-calling/): There’s this idea that everyone has a calling. When you do what you’re really supposed to do, somehow you’ll feel fulfilled in life. In fact, everything will just fall into place for you. I’ve heard that story over and over, and truthfully, I don’t buy it. I don’t buy it because as much as it […] - [Social Creatures](https://coachdebruyns.com/social-creatures/): I remember when I was around 10 years old and crazy about Karate. All the other kids would play soccer, rugby and cricket while I would practice my kicks day in and day out. Occasionally, I would also join them in playing some of the regular sports. I even tried out for the soccer team […] - [Mind Over Matter](https://coachdebruyns.com/mind-over-matter/): I was sitting in front of my computer and I could feel the heat at the back of my legs. It was a very cold day and I welcomed the warmth. Every day, I’d switch the heater on behind as part of my winter routine. The building I work in is fairly new and the […] - [I Burn](https://coachdebruyns.com/i-burn/): Do you remember the time you bumped your head? Confidence and stupidity seemingly have a lot in common. I remember watching my kid running along the edge of a huge staircase that led into our tidal pool. I call it ‘ours’ because most days we were the only people there. When you are five minutes […] - [How to be a Winner](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-to-be-a-winner/): A winner is a loser who keeps trying. Do you remember that story about the tortoise and the hare? If you don’t remember that story let me retell it to you in short. Once upon a time… J Basically the hare competed in a race against the tortoise. The hare was so much faster and […] - [Why Exercise?](https://coachdebruyns.com/why-exercise/): Everyone pretty much knows that exercise is important in maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Few people, however, know that it is also important for your mental and spiritual well-being. Don’t know where to start with doing physical exercise? Why not start by doing my morning strength and flexibility routine. It’s only 13 minutes long and it […] - [The Spirit of Discomfort](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-spirit-of-discomfort/): Have you ever told yourself that things would be so much better if only you didn’t have to catch the bus at 6am in the morning? Wouldn’t life be so much better if only you weren’t single? If only you had more money, you would be able to do so much more. If…. Only…. If […] - [Disgruntled Guys](https://coachdebruyns.com/disgruntled-guys/): I’ve spent the last few years of my life listening to disgruntled guys. “Women are the problem,” they say. The Youtube gurus are at it on the various MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) channels, MRA’s are blaming feminism and those who aren’t saying much are enjoying the abundance of a deregulated sexual market place- […] - [Your spirit is your strength](https://coachdebruyns.com/your-spirit-is-your-strength/): Your spirit is why everything matters in your life. It is because your spirit needs to be kept whole and sound. You need to keep your spirit full of light. Through bringing the mind, and the body in sync with the spirit you will achieve wholeness. Your spirit is the essence through which you connect […] - [Keep your body strong](https://coachdebruyns.com/keep-your-body-strong/): Having a strong body isn’t only about being aesthetically pleasing to the eye. Rather, having a strong body that you look after is about showing gratitude for what you have. It’s about feeling good and being able live your life being capable of doing more. - [Be a successful person](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-successful-person/): A successful person isn’t defined in how he or she compares to other people. Rather, a successful person is simply a person who is better than the person he or she was yesterday. If you don’t know who you are today you can’t know who you could be tomorrow. Find out who you are, what […] - [New year resolutions for 2020](https://coachdebruyns.com/new-year-resolutions-for-2020/): Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nullam porttitor facilisis enim accumsan auctor. Nam congue odio elit, sit amet vehicula diam suscipit in. Sed enim lacus, consequat eu tempus ac, fringilla vitae mauris. Morbi turpis libero, facilisis vitae eros id, cursus pharetra mauris. Pellentesque id cursus justo. Integer consectetur ut urna id consectetur. Quisque […] - [Better stretching for better fitness](https://coachdebruyns.com/better-stretching-for-better-fitness/): Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nullam porttitor facilisis enim accumsan auctor. Nam congue odio elit, sit amet vehicula diam suscipit in. Sed enim lacus, consequat eu tempus ac, fringilla vitae mauris. Morbi turpis libero, facilisis vitae eros id, cursus pharetra mauris. Pellentesque id cursus justo. Integer consectetur ut urna id consectetur. Quisque […] - [How to prepare for hot yoga](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-to-prepare-for-hot-yoga/): Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Nullam porttitor facilisis enim accumsan auctor. Nam congue odio elit, sit amet vehicula diam suscipit in. Sed enim lacus, consequat eu tempus ac, fringilla vitae mauris. Morbi turpis libero, facilisis vitae eros id, cursus pharetra mauris. Pellentesque id cursus justo. Integer consectetur ut urna id consectetur. Quisque […] - [Are Masculine Traits Really Toxic?](https://coachdebruyns.com/are-masculine-traits-really-toxic/): The phrase “toxic masculinity” has become increasingly common in contemporary discussions about men, relationships and society. It is often used to describe behaviours such as aggression, dominance, emotional restraint, competitiveness, risk-taking and the desire for authority. Some of these behaviours can certainly become destructive. Violence, abuse, coercion and uncontrolled aggression are harmful regardless of whether they are associated with masculinity, femininity or anything else. But that raises a more fundamental question: Are masculine traits themselves toxic—or can otherwise valuable traits become toxic when they are expressed without character, discipline or moral restraint? This distinction is important. A man can be physically […] - [Toxic Masculinity Is a Slogan, Not a Diagnosis](https://coachdebruyns.com/toxic-masculinity-is-a-slogan-not-a-diagnosis/): They keep asking whether masculine traits are toxic. The question is already loaded. It assumes that the problem is masculinity, not the collapse of it. A generation of boys has grown up hearing that their instincts are a public health crisis. Strength is “domination.” Ambition is “insecurity.” Leadership in the home is “control.” Provision is “patriarchy.” Fatherhood is optional. Self-respect is “fragility dressed up as ego.” After enough of that, a young man does one of two things. He either folds and becomes useful to everyone except himself, or he rebels into a cartoon version of manhood that is all noise […] - [My Husband Isn’t Attractive to Me](https://coachdebruyns.com/my-husband-isnt-attractive-to-me/):  I was lifting weights in the gym. The entire time, there was this woman watching me go through the motions of my routine. After about 45 minutes, I went to the bag, put my one leg over the rail while I wrapped my hand in a hand wrap. I then put my other leg over the rail, giving my hamstring a good stretch while I wrapped my other hand. This has always been my way of wrapping hands while stretching. I’m all about efficiency. I set the timer on my phone to 3 minutes and 15 seconds and started my round. […] - [The Satanic Origins of Feminism](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-satanic-origins-of-feminism/): Thandiwe is a single mother with five kids from five different baby daddies. She’s 35 years old and currently pregnant with her sixth child from her 12th boyfriend. Deep down, she’s hoping that this one will stick around, but she’s not all that invested in him anyway. They always run away. Staring out the cracked windowpane, she watches people walk past her house on their way to work. She remembers when her father would leave home to go work in the mines. She’d sit at that same window, only back then it wasn’t cracked, and watch him, and her mother walk […] - [The Marriage Contract](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-marriage-contract/): Allah advises that the believers marry. It is not ideal within a believing society for there to be many single men and women. Rather, it is better that people who are able to marry get married and to even forsake material demands in the interest of society and the chastity of the believers (24:32)  Marry off the single among you and those of your male and female slaves who are fit [for marriage]. If they are poor, God will provide for them from His bounty: God’s bounty is infinite, and He is all knowing. In Arabic, the word Nikah often refers to […] - [Forced Marriages and Consent](https://coachdebruyns.com/forced-marriages-and-consent/): The first legal and ethical principle we must adhere to undermines our culture of forcing people to marry. We force people to marry when we do not allow them to object, and/or we threaten to disown our own children when they disobey us. We do this using religion no less. The Qur’an states (17:23):  And your Lord has decreed that you worship not except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], “uff,” and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word. […] - [Marriage and the Quran Part 3](https://coachdebruyns.com/marriage-and-the-quran-part-3/): The Qur’an often discusses marriage and concubinage together. In many translations, the word nisa is wrongly translated as wives when, in fact, it just means women. There are also places where the Qur’an does use the word that could be translated as wives (azwaj) when exclusively referring to wives and not concubines. However, when the Qur’an refers to women in the context of sexual relations and uses the word ‘women’ (nisa), it includes all women permissible under its law and not only wives. For example, the Quran states (33:32):  O wives of the Prophet, you are not like anyone among women. […] - [Marriage and the Quran Part 2](https://coachdebruyns.com/marriage-and-the-quran-part-2/): A Cultural Shift We’ve noted that, practically, the loudest people on the block live in a cultural paradigm that bears little resemblance to much of our recent past. The technological era has created abundance for those few people who form the majority of popular discourse, and for whom there exist real existential problems. To begin with, the traditional values based on over twenty thousand years of known history are deemed as misogynistic and patriarchal, even though a big part of that history was also matriarchal and feminist. However, the matriarchal societies just didn’t fare very well in the face of patriarchy. […] - [Marriage and the Quran](https://coachdebruyns.com/marriage-and-the-quran/): Introduction There are hundreds, if not thousands, of books written on the subject of marriage. Most of these books are prescriptive books that tell men and women how to go about getting married and how to behave appropriately within marriage. These books are typically also romantic and far from the actual experiences people have in real life. Most of them also address marriage in purely monogamous terms, aside from a few books that are not for the English audience or the books that are evangelical about polygyny. Very few books talk about marriage as a social phenomenon that forms the backdrop […] - [Helping Others](https://coachdebruyns.com/helping-others/): In the Name of Allah the Compassionate the Merciful To give charity publicly is good, but to give to the poor privately is better for you, and will absolve you of your sins. And Allah is All-Aware of what you do. (2:271) When I was a kid, I was raised to believe that helping others is the default form of existence. My father was always engaged in helping people. Many of the people around him were people he was helping in one way or another. He was the perpetual helper. Now I have a son who has the exact same personality. […] - [The Female Breadwinner](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-female-breadwinner/): If a woman wants a man who is the breadwinner, she should marry a man who can afford that. She should also not work, but instead stay at home because that entitles her to have a breadwinner. However, that too doesn’t mean that she doesn’t earn her keep. She absolutely earns her keep as she works very hard to maintain a home and to look after the children. She IS doing a job, and earning her keep. Muslim women must get rid of these entitlement, satanic teachings of the Ulama. You are not special because you’re a woman; you are also […] - [Marriage Is A Serious Affair](https://coachdebruyns.com/marriage-is-a-serious-affair/): Marriage is a serious affair. Pun intended. You can’t just marry a woman because you feel you need a wife. You need to vet her fully and properly, both for her sake and your sake, so that hopefully your marriage doesn’t end in divorce. I’ve had women ask me to marry them, and I turned them down. Friends would say, “But she’s beautiful.” I would say, “Ok, you marry her, then.” I’ve seen enough men bored of their beautiful wives to understand that a woman’s beauty alone won’t carry her through a lifetime commitment. Then there’s the woman who would marry […] - [Hypergamy is Real](https://coachdebruyns.com/hypergamy-is-real/): When men complain about lack of support it’s because men don’t support each other. A lot of men are constantly talking to women and helping women. When it comes to supporting other men, they’re not willing to do so. Women, on average, won’t support men either because why should they? He’s a man. Why can’t he manage himself? What happens in the end is that men support women, and women support women. That’s why there are so many men complaining endlessly about having fallen through the cracks. Those aren’t just cracks, they are potholes. Let me give you an example: A […] - [What is a Wife?](https://coachdebruyns.com/what-is-a-wife/): From the book, “How to Choose and Keep a Wife: A Marriage Guide” by Coach De Bruyns First off, we won’t know how to choose a wife if we don’t know what a wife is. Many of us in the modern West have lost touch with what it means to have a wife because women in the West are not raised to be wives to begin with, except for a few. A wife is like a doctor. A doctor looks after patients, a wife looks after her husband and her children. Being a wife is a job function. It’s not a […] - [About Islam Part 1: The God Concept](https://coachdebruyns.com/about-islam-part-1-the-god-concept/): Originally presented in video format – now adapted as a written blog post for deeper reflection.In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful.All praise belongs to Allah, Lord of the Worlds. It is He who created us in truth, so that we might identify the truth through His guidance sent with His Prophets and Messengers, the last of whom was Muhammad, the son of Abdullah (peace and blessings be upon him and his family). As to what follows:I’m launching this series to give a clear, birds-eye view of Islam’s foundational principles. This isn’t feel-good motivational content or emotional […] - [Red Pill and the Quran: Is the Quran Closer to Red Pill Reality or Simp Culture?](https://coachdebruyns.com/red-pill-and-the-quran-is-the-quran-closer-to-red-pill-reality-or-simp-culture/): Originally from the video “Red Pill and the Quran, “Sometimes I catch flak for my content. People say it’s completely outside the context of Islam. As a Muslim, they argue, I should stick strictly to quoting Quranic verses, Hadith, or books of jurisprudence every single time I open my mouth. Let me push back on that right now. Just because I don’t begin every sentence with “Allah says in Surah X…” doesn’t mean my message is outside the pale of Islam. The Quran itself speaks directly to the realities of life—marriage, oaths, family conflict, human nature, and the hard choices men […] - [The Myth of the Gender Wars](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-myth-of-the-gender-war/): Every day, I see posts and comments that portray either men or women in a negative light. The Red Pill movement has a tendency to portray women based on the traits and experiences of the worst kinds of women. “All women are whores!” Similarly, feminists try their best to paint men with the same brush that is used to paint those men who are in prison for murder and rape. “All men are rapists.” Or they say, “Women give birth, what do men do?” In reality, a war between the genders has no victors. In this blog, I’ll carry it out […] - [Strategy for Sexual Fulfillment](https://coachdebruyns.com/strategies-for-sexual-fulfillment/): Welcome back to the channel, everyone. This is the third episode in my ongoing series on sex, marriage, and the powerful dynamics that either make or break a relationship. In today’s video, Strategies for Sexual Fulfillment in Marriage, I went much deeper than usual and gave men a complete, no-fluff blueprint for keeping the sexual side of marriage exciting, passionate, deeply satisfying, and joyful for both husband and wife—whether you’re in a traditional monogamous marriage or practising polygyny.I opened the video with an analogy that almost every man instantly understands: imagine eating a perfectly cooked steak for dinner every single night, […] - [Virgin Sex and Muslim Culture](https://coachdebruyns.com/virgin-sex-and-muslim-culture/): The discussion is rooted in Quran-first principles, historical hadiths, and practical advice, emphasizing patience, consent, and mutual fulfillment to build strong marriages. He promotes his book, Polygyny Maybe? (linked in the post) for further reading. The content flows logically from the cultural context of virginity and lack of knowledge, to courtship and marriage processes, and finally to practical guidance for newlyweds and long-term relationships. Below is a structured breakdown for clarity. 1. Cultural Context: Virginity, Lack of Education, and Pornography’s Impact Personal Anecdote and Community Norms: The speaker shares that he entered marriage knowing only basic biology from school, with no […] - [Should a Dresscode be Imposed on Society?](https://coachdebruyns.com/dresscode-and-islam/): Hello everyone, welcome back to my channel. In my video “Why there must be a prescribed dress code,” I explained why the idea that clothing is purely a personal choice is not only wrong but actually dangerous for any healthy society.Most people today say, “It’s my body, my choice—if I want to walk around naked, that’s my right.” But I showed why that thinking collapses the moment you test it in the real world.I started with a simple thought experiment. Imagine a conservative Muslim village where every woman wears the full niqab—you can only see her eyes. One day a woman […] - [SEXLESS MARRIAGES](https://coachdebruyns.com/sexless-marriages/): Hey everyone, today I want to dive into a topic that’s often taboo but hits home for so many couples: sexless marriages. I’ve encountered this issue repeatedly where people, especially women, express frustration and dissatisfaction in their sex lives, while men tend to feel content most of the time. It’s rooted in our biological differences—men are visually stimulated and can get aroused easily, anytime, anywhere, as long as there’s even remote attraction. Women, on the other hand, are more complex; we need strong emotional attraction, a sense of safety, the right mood, and ongoing buildup to truly enjoy and feel satisfied […] - [Is the Quran closer to the Red Pill Movement or to the Simp Movement?](https://coachdebruyns.com/red-pill-and-the-quran/): Overview The video titled “Red Pill and the Quran,” uploaded by the channel Coach De Bruyns on December 20, 2025, poses the question in its description: “Is the Quran closer to the Red Pill Movement or to the Simp Movement?” The speaker, presumably the channel host, delves into Islamic teachings from the Quran, specifically Surah 66 (At-Tahrim, or “The Prohibition”), to argue that the holy text aligns more closely with “Red Pill” philosophy—a modern internet movement emphasizing realism, discernment, and assertiveness in relationships, particularly with women—rather than “simping,” which implies excessive deference or weakness in such dynamics. Key Concepts Introduced Red […] - [Forced Marriages and Consent](https://coachdebruyns.com/forced-marriages-in-islam/): The first legal and ethical principle we must adhere to undermines our culture of forcing people to marry. We force people to marry when we do not allow them to object and or we threaten to disown our own children when they disobey us. We do this using religion no less. The Qur’an states (17:23): And your Lord has decreed that you worship not except Him, and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], “uff,” and do not repel them but speak to them a […] - [12 REASONS FOR POLYGYNY #12](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-and-having-faith/): POLYGYNY CAN ENHANCE YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD REASON # 12 Polygyny is not easy. It requires of men to forgo their lust in favor of being responsible. It requires of women to forgo their jealousy in favor of a Godly husband’s ambitions. Fighting against yourself and your own impulses so as to color within the lines requires faith and conviction. More than faith and conviction, it requires reliance on God. Most importantly, it requires that you strengthen your relationship with God so you can adequately meet the challenges of life in a principled and Godly manner.  Having multiple wives is a […] - [12 Reasons For Polygyny #11](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-coaching-6/): Reason # 11 Polygyny Enhances the Economy When is an economy a good economy? Is it when there are 3000 billionaires? Or is it when there is a big middle class? The deregulated sexual marketplace is not unlike the deregulated economy. Pure capitalism and pure hedonism, which are both based on greed, result in human annihilation. Billionaires can technically make billions in their sleep due to automation and the financial industry, whose primary purpose is to move money around and profit from transactions. I am providing a brief explanation because this article isn’t intended to be a comprehensive lesson in economics, […] - [12 Reasons For Polygyny #10](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-coaching-5/): Reason # 10 Polygyny Protects Monogamy I alluded to polygyny being the guardian of real monogamy in society. This might sound contradictory because many of us think like computers, in 1’s and 0’s. In reality polygyny isn’t the opposite of monogamy. In the past, both polygyny and monogamy was simply called marriage. Polygyny isn’t the natural enemy of monogamy, it is in fact to marriage what America was to Western Europe- its guardian. Enforced monogamy is the antithesis of itself. We witnessed the destruction of marriage in societies that have tried to enforce monogamy. There are two reasons for this: it […] - [12 Reasons for Polygyny](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-builds-resilience/): Reason # 9 Polygyny Builds Resilience A tough life teaches a person to be tough. The natural thing for people to do is to run away from difficulties. We tend to believe the more comfortable we can make life, the better. Whereas, in reality, difficulties build resilience. Nothing worthwhile doing is easy. When you watch a boxer deliver that knockout punch, you are seeing the accumulated effects of his many years of blood, sweat and tears, to turn himself into the fighter you see on your screen. When you saw Usain Bolt sprint, what you didn’t see is the years of […] - [12 Reasons For Polygyny](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-coaching-4/): Reason # 7 Polygyny Solves Sexual Incompatibility Problems Let’s walk through a scenario. You’re in grade 12, and you’ve been with your high school sweetheart for 3 years. Before you go to college, you and your parents decide that it’s best to get married. You’re both 18 years old, and everything is fantastic for the first seven years. You’re both at college, and you graduate together four years later. Your wife falls pregnant at 23, and by 25, she’s preoccupied with the kid. You’re working your ten hours a day trying to pay the mortgage on your new house, and the […] - [12 Reasons For Polygyny](https://coachdebruyns.com/12-reasons-for-polygyny-3/): REASON # 6 POLYGYNY BUILDS WEALTH  Imagine being a woman alone raising five or six kids while your husband is hard at work trying to put food on the table and you know you could help him, but you just don’t have the time. Imagine, you could get a full-time baby sister that you didn’t have to pay because she’d be sharing the same resources you have as your co-wife? Suddenly, you have two household incomes and a full-time mother. Take it a step further. Your co-wife falls pregnant and now needs help, so you help. You decide that you’ll take […] - [12 Reasons For Polygyny](https://coachdebruyns.com/12-reasons-for-polygyny-2/): Reason # 8 Polygyny Encourages Marriage Have you ever talked to men and asked them why they’re not married yet when they’re nearing their thirties? Do you think most men would say it’s because they can’t afford it? That’s not normally the case. A lot of men, especially in our Western world, say that they’re not ready commitment. Or they say that they just haven’t found that one woman worth committing to. Perhaps they just do not possess the vocabulary to express their real grievance. It’s not that they aren’t prepared to have a girlfriend. They very often do. It’s not […] - [12 REASONS FOR POLYGYNY #5](https://coachdebruyns.com/12-reasons-for-polygyny/): REASON #5 POLYGYNY PREVENTS SEXUALLY TRANSMITTED DISEASES In the introduction to this article I alluded to the severe reduction in sexual communism as a result of the institutionalization of polygyny. In societies where polygyny is practiced people have fewer sexual partners not more of them. More importantly, the loop for any particular sexual ecosystem (a man and his wives) is closed. If a man marries a woman, and they both don’t sleep with other people, it’s a closed monogamous system. There is very little chance that either the man or the woman would get an STD. If the goal was to […] - [12 Reasons For Polygyny](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-coaching-3/): REASON #4 POLYGYNY PROTECTS MARRIAGES What is the most common complaint that women have in their marriages? They complain that their husbands are inadequate one way or another. Either the man doesn’t earn enough or he doesn’t satisfy her sexually, or he is abusive or he cheats. These are common complaints.  What is the most common complaint of men in their marriages? Men usually don’t complain much. They usually say that their wives are great but they would have liked to have more sex.  Of the two genders, it is usually women who have most of the complaints.  There is one […] - [12 Reasons for Polygyny](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-coaching-2/): REASON #3 IT PROTECTS WOMEN Believe it or not, men who desire to have sex with multiple women CAN do so rather easily without ever having to marry any of them. Marriage is the guarantee that men do not take women without commitment. Most fathers, if they must be honest, would rather have their daughters get married than have them sleep around. A father almost always wants to know that the guy who expresses interest in his daughter is SERIOUS. However, what’s to say a guy can’t be serious about more than one woman? Of course he can. He does so […] - [12 Reasons For Polygyny](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-coaching/): Get Yourself Another Wife Coach De Bruyns  – 4 January 2026   Introduction Over the many years I’ve advocated for polygyny and practiced it, I’ve consistently gotten a dearth of opposition from all over the world. I’ve gotten opposition from Christians, Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Atheists, Feminists and even so called traditional men and women. I’ve been shadow banned, blocked, silenced and even threatened. I’ve lost friends along the way whose wives would rather not have their husband associate with a man who says it’s good to have more than one wife. In the midst of all this unrelenting opposition I have remained […] - [Dear Ladies,](https://coachdebruyns.com/dear-ladies/): Here is some priceless free advice I’ve gathered over the years of coaching couples. When your husband leaves home in the morning, he enters an office with four women: Sally, Megan, Halimah, and Chevon. Sally is his secretary. She wears high heels and a mini-skirt every day, always obeys her boss, and does whatever he asks. Occasionally she flashes a bright smile, and on days she’s ovulating, she makes overt sexual gestures because her hormones dictate it. Megan is the tea girl. She brings tea and snacks whenever he wants, wondering what life would be like if she didn’t have to […] - [Why Polygyny?](https://coachdebruyns.com/why-polygyny/): Brothers, if you’re reading this, you’re probably a man who’s tired of the monogamy trap, feeling that natural pull to expand your family and legacy with more than one wife. Polygyny isn’t for the weak or the promiscuous—it’s for decent men who want loyalty, commitment, and a closed system where everyone benefits. In my book “Polygyny Maybe? A Practical Guide to Polygyny,” I break it down with real stories, like Bilal’s journey from one exhausted wife to adding a second, and the challenges that come with it. This isn’t about cheating or side pieces; it’s about building a strong, exclusive unit […] - [A Socio-Economic Solution to Enable Traditional Marriage and Reduce Pre-Marital Sex in America](https://coachdebruyns.com/a-socio-economic-solution-to-enable-traditional-marriage/): Proposed by Mohummud De Bruyns  with Analysis by Grok 3 (xAI), March 18, 2025 Introduction This exercise explores how to enable traditional marriage (monogamous or polygynous) for most U.S. adult men and women, assuming stable families benefit society and pre-marital sex undermines them. Starting with only 1.5%-2.3% of men (2-3M) affording a balanced lifestyle ($80K-$100K), we iteratively adjusted economic and social structures to reach ~75%-80% marriage coverage, leaving 20%-25% unmarried as a realistic flexibility margin. Baseline: The Problem Step 1: Economic Reform Attempts Step 2: Extended Family Model for 75% Step 3: Polygyny for High Earners Final Outcome Conclusion This hybrid […] - [WHAT IS A HUSBAND?](https://coachdebruyns.com/what-is-a-husband/): Marriage itself doesn’t exist in a vacuum. A husband isn’t just a man who is married to a woman. A husband is an agent of order, law, and governance for his wives and children. He must make sure there is compliance on the part of his flock as mandated by God. The hierarchy of marriage consists of the man as the family head. The woman is the keeper of his house and children. This falls within a bigger hierarchy. God is the head of the Church, which is the earliest version of the State in Western society. God is the Head […] - [Ladies Only Gyms in the UK](https://coachdebruyns.com/ladies-only-gyms-in-the-uk/): In today’s world, where being woke seems to be the order of the day, there has been an increase in unconventional communities, each fighting to be heard and recognized. One such community is the Trans community, which includes men who have transitioned to being women, and women who have transitioned to being men. Since the mid-20th century, this community has been pushing for acceptance, and a part of the world has gradually come to terms with it. However, there has been a pushback by others who do not support this movement and what it stands for. In the year 2021, Natalee […] - [Exploring Modern Marriage: A Multifaceted Perspective](https://coachdebruyns.com/what-is-marriage/): Is marriage a one-size-fits-all? Must it be that a man provides for a woman who is the homemaker? Or can marriage assume various formats? Must it be monogamous, or can it also be polygamous or polyandrous? When is it no longer considered marriage? In this essay, I will deconstruct the various levels of marriage. I will explain what it entails at a minimum. I will discuss what is workable. Finally, I will examine what is ideal. It is important for us in the modern world to gain a nuanced understanding of marriage. This understanding will allow us to explore many marriageable […] - [Patriarchy and Marriage](https://coachdebruyns.com/patriarchy-and-marriage/): A real Christian and Muslim can only marry women from patriarchy as wives becuase it is ordinarily a requirement for a virgin woman to be given in marriage by her male guardian who is typically her father or grandfather. The idea that a woman is “given away” shows that marriage is a patriarchal institution. On the far left, in matriarchal institutions they have walk in marriages when men come at night, sleep with the woman and leave in the morning. A typical man can have hundreds of such marriages in his lifetime, and a woman is free to engage in as […] - [How do I know when my husband or wife is cheating?](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-do-i-know-when-my-husband-or-wife-is-cheating/): This is a question as a relationship coach I get often. As a polygynous man, I personally experienced women cheating mainly because those women didn’t understand polygyny. They felt, that since I had multiple wives, they can have multiple husbands but of course hid the fact that they were pursuing their options. In an ideal world, every woman would be able to have her own husband and not have to share him. However, the world isn’t ideal, and without polygyny a lot of women will simply never get married. As a man, who has also pursued other additional women in marriage, […] - [About Islam](https://coachdebruyns.com/about-islam/): In the Name of Allah the Most Gracious Most Merciful The Praise belongs to Allah, Lord of the Worlds. It is He who created us in truth, so that we might identify the truth through His guidance sent with His Prophets and Messengers, the last of which was Muhammad the son of Abdullah (God’s peace and blessing on him and his). As to what follows: I begin herewith a series about the foundational principles of Islam and how its components come together. This series will cover the following topics: Initially these five topics will be presented in a short form, and […] - [Gender Roles in Islam](https://coachdebruyns.com/gender-roles-in-islam/): There are predefined gender roles within Islam such that men are exclusively identified as men and not to be confused with women, and women are exclusively identified as women and not be confused with men. In the modern world there has been a wealth of confusion regarding gender roles, attitudes and behaviors to the extent that in the West they no longer know how to define what a woman is. They have taken to refering to women as either ‘a woman’ or ‘a biological woman.’ All this confusion stems from blurring gender roles to begin with where women became feminists. Thus […] - [TRUE STORY ABOUT OBEDIENCE TO YOUR HUSBAND](https://coachdebruyns.com/obedient-wife/): A wife of mine once went to a place I didn’t approve of her going. It wasn’t a bad place, but I had specifically asked her that day not to go there. However, she felt that she was in a predicament because she already promised the owner of the place that she’d come. Later in the day I checked up on her not convinced that she was committed to my order. As I suspected, I was right. She went anyway. I very calmly told her that I needed to now find a way to punish her while I am out of […] - [Some general remarks from my reading of the Qur'an](https://coachdebruyns.com/submission-to-allah/): God, in the Qur’an, requires complete submission such that the believer is able to give up his life, his income, his amibtions and his desires without hesitation seeking God’s Mercy and Pleasure. Abraham portrayed this best in his actions and in his words when we said, “Indeed my prayers, and my sacrifices, and my life and my death belongs to Allah Lord of the Worlds.” Another interesting observation I’ve made in Surah Tawbah is that those who did not establish the prayers were not seen as part of the community of the believers and in the context of war were to […] - [Ramadan Mubarak](https://coachdebruyns.com/ramadan-kareem/): Wishing all my Muslim readers a Ramadan Mubarak. May Allah grant you all an elevated position in nearness to Him and accept from all of you your acts of worship during and after this holy month. Fasting is an exercise of worship that resets the body, mind and spirit to a base level so that man can once again be appreciative of God’s bounties such as food, drink and sex. Hence, Muslims abstain from these things from before the sun rises to after it sets. This abstinence of otherwise lawful things also helps the believer to better stay away from the […] - [Pursuing a previously married woman](https://coachdebruyns.com/marrying-a-divorcee/): There are instances in which a previously married woman would be more ideal to marry in a monogamous marriage. It is especially true in a culture where promiscuity is rampant. At the very least, a woman who was married for a long time likely wasn’t sleeping around and has already shown that her interest is to be married. If she is up for marriage yet again, that is further proof that stability and commitment is her preference and that she doesn’t have an appetite for sleeping around. However, marrying a previously married woman comes with complications that are difficult to overcome […] - [Becoming Muslim](https://coachdebruyns.com/becoming-muslim/): Taking the Shahada (Testifying that there is no god but Allah and Muhammad (s) is His Messenger) begets obligations and prohibitions to complete your statement through the beautification of your actions and the straightening out of your life. The first obligation that falls upon a person who claims belief is the 5 daily prayers and it is the distinguishing practice between the believers and disbelievers. Jabir (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said, “Between a man and disbelief and paganism is the abandonment of Salat (prayer).” [Muslim]. Moreover, it is the promise of Allah that […] - [CONCUBINAGE](https://coachdebruyns.com/concubines/): In ancient and modern times there always exist a category of woman that was labelled a concubine. In different cultures they had different words for it, but it essentially amounted to the same thing: a lesser wife. In the various studies done in the field of cultural anthropology it is documented that people throughout Africa, Arabia, China, Japan and even in the Americas had similar constructs. Why should it be any different today? Or is it any different today? Well, the answer is yes and no. Yes, it is different today because we have enforced monogamy in the Western world which […] - [A brief analysis of Quran 4:34](https://coachdebruyns.com/domestic-violence/): The Right to Protection By modern standards one might accuse the Qur’an of being chauvinist book because it insists that men inherently protect women. In our time men largely go unacknowledged in the West when they play the role of protector but are shamed when they fail to protect women. The verse we will discuss under this title is often also used to prove that men must financially support women. However, I will demonstrate that the part of this verse that relates to men is not an order at all, but merely a statement (4:34): Men are in charge of and […] - [Brotherhood](https://coachdebruyns.com/patriarchy/): There was a time that men understood the importance of supporting other men in the pursuit of order, family and safety. A nuclear family could not survive on its own in the wide expanses of the earth where raids were not far and few between. Fast forward and we had large empires as a result of male cooperation and the impulse to conquer and pillage. These things later on were considered objectively bad, but they are not necessarily so. Without dominance, power, and law, there can be no civilisation and the chaos that follows is infinitely worse. One of the fringe […] - [Where does monogamy start?](https://coachdebruyns.com/monogamy/): You cannot expect a generation of people who grew up in broken homes to all be monogamous. You cannot expect people who don’t know how to be loyal, to be loyal. Monogamy starts with the way in which you were raised. Did you have to carry out tasks to completion, or could you chop and change halfway through? Did you have to pursue long-term goals and commit to achieving the desired results? For example, did you get a black belt in a martial art or become highly competent at playing the piano? Did you stick to the choices you made early […] - [Islamic Governance?](https://coachdebruyns.com/islamic-governance/): If one were to read the Quran, and I would encourage everyone to do so, you would notice one of the biggest themes aside from worshipping One God Alone, is justice and equality before the law. Hence, some of the earliest political theorists established an independent judiciary and opined that God is in fact the head of the State. In other words, it was possible to try the President or Caliph in a court of law. I am aware we can do that in South Africa, but show me how many Muslim countries you can do that in? The problem with […] - [Modern Muslim Women](https://coachdebruyns.com/modern-muslim-women/): The problem with modern Muslim teachings is that it adapted to the modern world while retaining half of what was present in the past. As a result, the modern Muslim woman wants the best of both worlds. She wants her own career that will keep her occupied for eight to ten hours of the day, and she wants a man who is a provider and protector. Her money should not be used for anything useful as it relates to her family because a woman’s money is her own, but her labour itself isn’t spent on her family- because she is the […] - [Was Prophet Muhammad (s) domesticated?](https://coachdebruyns.com/prophet-of-islam/): There’s a narrative modern Muslims pursue that is essentially the making of their own imaginations because of how they interact with Hadith underpinned by the current status quo. They portray the Prophet Muhammad (s) as this highly domesticated man who cooked and cleaned for his 11 wives and who was massively indulgent, trainable and romantic. However, when you take all the narrations about his life and try to reconstruct his life in one day you would quickly realise that between politics, teaching the religion, prayers at night, sitting with his male companions, battles, wars and marriages, it was impossible for him […] - [Books For You!](https://coachdebruyns.com/books-for-you/) - [Survival Strategies between Men and Women](https://coachdebruyns.com/survival-of-women/): Men prioritise the survival of others, women prioritise their own survival. Read that again. Women are the carriers of the species and men are the carriers of a civilization- essentially built in the interest of safety or the survival of a collective. Men are built to act in the interest of a group, women are built to act in the interest of themselves and to attach themselves to a group in the interest of safety. Understand that you cannot engage with women as if they are men. Women seek mates because it is a pathway to their survival. Men seek mates […] - [The Power of Modest Dress](https://coachdebruyns.com/modesty/): For the Western trope who thinks his culture is superior to everyone else’s, the left (covered women) represents oppression while the right represents liberation. Whereas for the other side, the right represents oppression and the left represents liberation. Let me explain: When a woman covers her body she has the POWER to decide which men are at liberty to see her body and who has the right to sexualise her. Yes, men can even sexualise women who are fully covered- that’s true- but they are less likely to do so when there are those on the right who already are much […] - [The idea that allowing polygyny would create a collapse in society is a fallacy](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny_hypergamy/): Polygyny solves the problem of hypergamy as follows: Already in the Western world about 30% of young men under thirty are virgins while 100% of adult women have had or are having sex. Polygyny solves this problem because it requires that the man stay long-term with the women he wants. In other words, he doesn’t cycle through hundreds of women. He will only have his cohort of women, and once he cannot manage to have anymore than he already has he is off the market. Whereas currently, the top 20% of men are never off the market and cycle through scores […] - [All I See is You](https://coachdebruyns.com/all-i-see-is-you/): I recently watched the movie, “All I See is You” where this blind woman is the wife of an insurance broker residing in Thailand. I thought this movie would make excellent Red Pill content because it lines up with all the teachings of the Red Pill Movement that has found currency over the past few years. If you didn’t see the movie then this is a spoiler alert. Don’t read further. First go watch the movie on Netflix or wherever and then read this blog. Fantasy The first and most obvious truth that we have always spoken of in the Red […] - [Decent men do not treate women who aren’t their sisters as sisters.](https://coachdebruyns.com/decent-men-do-not-treate-women-who-arent-their-sisters-as-sisters/): There’s a phenomenon that I’ve observed, especially amongst Arabs, who when they want to cross the threshold of what is normally appropriate in Arab and Islamic culture, they say, “He is like a brother to me” or “she is like a sister to me.” A friend of mine married an Arab girl who literally used to call him “brother” to cross that threshold. Not only, is this incorrect and categorically forbidden in Islam because Allah forbade that you take anyone as a relative who is not a relative, a son who isn’t a son, a daughter who isn’t a daughter, and […] - [Why a spoken for woman shouldn't have male friends](https://coachdebruyns.com/she-shouldnt-have-male-friends/): I have had this debate over and over again where women have told me that they are perfectly fine with having male friends and their husbands don’t mind. Uhum, Will Smith didn’t mind and looked what happened to him? The fact is that male intimacy doesn’t work the same way as female intimacy, which is why they can’t play by the same rules. A man can and often does talk to women whom he’ll promptly forget about the minute he walks away. He won’t ever wonder what she thinks of him, whether she likes him or not, and what type of […] - [Fundamentals of Islam in Brief](https://coachdebruyns.com/pillars-of-islam/): As per the established Sunni doctrine Origin of Sunnism When the Prophet Muhammad (s) (d.632 CE) emerged on the world stage in the seventh century, he did not bring a fully fleshed out religious doctrine. What he brought was the Qur’an. When he died, the practice of this Book was found in the members of his community. However, since the community grew and the demands of empire became more intense, they had to deal with many issues beyond the scope of early Islam. In the early period, the Prophet Muhammad (s) and his followers were continually under threat, and as borne […] - [Male Attention is a Drug](https://coachdebruyns.com/male-attention-is-a-drug/): Male attention is more than just a guy showing some interest in a woman. Male attention is addictive, and most women will do almost anything to get it. Almost everything a woman does is for the benefit of men, even though most women will never admit that. She might say that she dresses provocatively for herself. She posts suggestive pictures on social media because it makes her feel good. Well, truth be told if it was a ladies only platform it wouldn’t feel that good, now would it? What is the kinds of conversations women might have with themselves when they […] - [Muslim Marriage Vows](https://coachdebruyns.com/marriage-vows/): People asked me what the default marriage vows would be for a Muslim marriage. I decided to draw it up here. You can use this when you get married so that you can understand what the rights and obligations are towards your spouse. In the name of Allah, the Most Gracious the Most Merciful. I,                                                                     , pledge the following terms with regards to my marriage to                                                 : 1) That I will do my best to uphold the commands of Allah founded in the Quran, and follow in the footsteps of the Messenger of Allah (s) according to the best of my […] - [What should your relationship with wealth be like as a Muslim? ](https://coachdebruyns.com/islam-hedonism-and-hoarding/): Can Muslims pursue wealth just for fun? - [Make Marriage Easier!](https://coachdebruyns.com/make-marriage-easier/): In almost all cultures and religions we have a concept of marriage. Marriage is a universal concept, and yet it has become universally tough for people to get married. In this short blog I will explore why marriage has become tough and what we can do to help people get married. Economic Burdens The way we judge economic standing as a species is by looking at what is ‘normal’ for those around us. In other words, there is an unending race to the top. Every strata of society aims to be better than it currently is and expectations naturally shift. To […] - [Why the Tate's are innocent](https://coachdebruyns.com/why-the-tates-are-innocent/): I’ve been watching content of Andrew Tate for about a year now. I came across him just before he became mega famous as being just another guy in the Manosphere. Although he might not have classified himself as that. Truth be told, a lot of what he was saying is part of a pretty standard narrative in the Red Pill and Manoshpere space. There was a lot of overlap between what he was saying and people like Rollo Tomassi, Coach Greg Adams, and even Gonzalo Lira. Nothing Andrew Tate was saying in fact was all that unique, but what was different […] - [It is what it is](https://coachdebruyns.com/winnersandlosers/): WINNERS AND LOSERS There is a trend to want to establish a world where there are no losers. If there are no losers, there are no winners. By definition if there is a winner that means someone has lost. If we change the rules of the game such that no one can win, we’ll discover at some point that no one would want to play. Human beings are built to compete with each other. If you eliminate competition, you eliminate progress. Survival requires people to struggle and compete for resources. There’s a good chance that those who don’t compete in nature […] - [IT IS WHAT IT IS](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-to-understand-your-world/): COACH DE BRUYN’S PHILOSOPHY IN A NUTSHELL BOOKS PUBLISHED BY AUTHOR Live Your Life as a Man: Reclaim Your Masculinity This book is meant to help men live their lives authentically. There is a crisis of masculinity in the world and very few people out there have a balanced solution to the problem. This book attempts to give a balanced solution. It’s a short read and is meant to be accessible to everyone. It is meant to be referred to often so that men can continuously remind themselves about what their priorities ought to be. POLYGYNY MAYBE? A Practical Guide to […] - [POLYGYNY MAYBE NOT? A GUIDE TO MONOGAMY](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny_maybe_not/): I cannot give you a rule book on monogamous marriage without first clarifying why monogamy is difficult for many people. Hence, some of what I state in this book is a restatement of some of the content in my previous book. - [My First Fiction](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-terrorist-next-door/): Chapter 1 Who am I Am I a loser?  Hi I’m Jack Higgins. I’m going to tell you my story of how I met the girl of my dreams and… FROZE. Well, yeah, at first I froze, then I sulked. After sulking, I gained some extra weight. But before we get into all that, let me tell you what my life was like, and why I needed to change it. First let me switch off this video game because I’m like so way ahead of everyone else on Fortnite, I just can’t afford to get distracted – from the game I […] - [Training in Ramadan](https://coachdebruyns.com/training-in-ramadan/): هل تريدين التدريب البدني في رمضان؟ انضموا إليّ وأنا أعطي لكم كيف أتدرب في رمضان The first thing you must remember is that Ramadan is the month where we dedicate more of our time to worshipping Allah and less of our time on things we would normally do. Therefore, even if you want to keep fit in Ramadan, it is not the best time to START training if you haven't already been training. So if you live your life without exercise, wait until after Ramadan to start, because starting now will affect your ability to fast and to uphold your acts […] - [LOVE ME FOR WHO I AM](https://coachdebruyns.com/love-me-for-who-i-am/): Have you ever heard the song, “Love me for Me” by Jamali? I grew up with songs of female artists singing about how men should just accept them for who they are. Now, obviously, in general people should all be accepted for who they are because there is realistically nothing else you could possibly do. However, in the context of an intimate relationship, it is perfectly right to be picky. Yet, men are taught to accept and women are taught to be picky. In reality, everyone should be picky because being in a relationship with someone means sharing your personal space […] - [The Hypocrisy of Western Men](https://coachdebruyns.com/hypocrisy_of_western_men/): Over years of dealing with Western men and Western ideals I’ve come to realise that there is an inherent contradiction with most of the ways in which they approach sex and the sexual market place. Being part of the Manosphere, there are real problems in the Gynocentric Western nations that favour women and women’s rights to the extent that men are excluded from society. It is why I mainly focus on men’s issues because I am empathetic towards men and I view feminism as the invention of Satan. Having said that, I also believe that Western men are basically hypocrites because […] - [Polygyny Maybe?](https://coachdebruyns.com/polygyny-maybe/): When men and women start out in polygyny they often struggle. Women struggle with feeling jealous and have trouble reigning it in. Men struggle with having to divide their time between two or more families. - [Do you know who your father is?](https://coachdebruyns.com/know-your-father/): Part of the problem that has befallen modern man is that we often no longer know from whence we come. Part of the human evolution was to survive in a group. That group was the tribe. Everyone had a tribe, some tribes were bigger than others. In today’s modern landscape we no longer know where we come from. Who were our ancestors? What were their traditions? Does it even matter? Everyone, of course, must at some point have known their mothers. Mother and child, however, doesn’t equal society. It doesn’t give any person a sense of where they belong. It never […] - [My thoughts on the movie “Don’t Look Up"](https://coachdebruyns.com/dont-look-up/): Spoiler Alert! If you haven’t yet watched the movie you should probably not read this. I’ll not divulge the details of the movie but I’ll tell you what I think it blatantly points out. America, and the entire world as a result, is basically screwed. Not because of lack of resources or the lack of freedom, but, ironically, because of the exact opposite: too much resources and too much freedom.  The movie depicts the dumbing down of Americans (which I more or less consider a fact coming from South African) and the stupidity of liberalism. If I say the sky is […] - [2050](https://coachdebruyns.com/metaverse-neurolink-iot/): It’s 6am in the morning. I’m still plugged in. I open my eyes, of course I don’t really need them because I can see with images being fed directly into my mind through my new neurolink v6, by SaceX. Everything is crystal clear with my Oculus 12 headset. I tell my headset with my mind to enter prayer mode. I am at once transported to the virtual mosque where I pray. I’m ready to have breakfast shortly thereafter and while I eat I watch the latest news. There is a new hype about pre-crime, the AI mega mind, affectionately called ‘Mum’ […] - [Gender roles between the old and the new](https://coachdebruyns.com/gender-roles/): In traditional societies and even in modern societies men are expected, as part of their manhood, to be providers. I have, and still advocate that men be providers but I have made it conditional to the type of women they are married to, if at all. Simply put, we must view traditional gender roles in terms of the duties that were traditionally allocated to them and not in terms of the actual gender. If a man works and earns money, he will be financially liable to spend of that money on his family. If a woman works and earns money, she […] - [The purpose of law and the Rule of Law](https://coachdebruyns.com/rule-of-law/): It is often said that when there is no law in a society that they follow the law of the jungle. In the jungle the fittest survive, might is right, and animals rule others through sheer dominance. That is an oversimplification, because ethologists have noted that there are significant cultural climates or customs that regulate pack animals that mitigate some of the violence that can ensure in the competition for dominance. Sometimes dominance is acquired through cunning rather than force. Females may offer themselves to the dominant male to acquire greater status and protection amongst Ape species. A rising Alpha may […] - [The Principles](https://coachdebruyns.com/manly-principles/): As a rule, always put the shoe on the other foot when you want to do something you are not sure is right. Would you like that other men flirt with your wife? So why would it be ok for you to do that? - [The Stupidity of MGTOW](https://coachdebruyns.com/mgtow-is-dumb/): Real men are responsible. Real men know that actions have consequences. Real men don't sleep around. - [The decision](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-decision/): I ran toward himAnd he turned away.I tried to hold on to himI could never get him to stay. I got tired, bone weary.Just went through the motions. Ignored the grief etched on his face So severely. Waited for my chance to escape. One day I was free.Left without a backward glance. What had he ever done for me. A year ago, the calls started coming.My wife would answer the phone.She would look at me, I would turn away. She’d shrug and say I’m not home. Then came letters in bright envelopes. Cards for lost birthdays.Little packages like boxes of hope. […] - [Writing Letters](https://coachdebruyns.com/a-story-on-marriage/): By Laylah De Bruyns As the sun started to set on the horizon and twilight tinged the lingering hues of the day, the muadhin began his call to the Maghrib prayer. The people gathered in the courtyard at simple trestle tables murmured a prayer before breaking their fast. A mass supper was a frequent occurrence during the holy month of Ramadan. Everyone had a sip of water and a date and then went into the Masjid to pray. After Maghrib, every one settled to eat. Ladies on one side of the courtyard and men on the other side. Mariam was sitting […] - [From the book, "Live your Life as a Man"](https://coachdebruyns.com/where-did-masculinity-go-wrong/): Be strong, be brave, be useful, be you. You are a man and as a man you must hold to what your expectations are. Incidentally, men do not have nearly as many expectations as women do. That’s why your expectations are what matters, not hers. - [From the book, 'Get and Keep a Man.'](https://coachdebruyns.com/how-to-keep-a-man/): Prologue 5 Introduction 6 A chaste wife 9 A feminine wife 16 A pleasant wife 20 A responsible wife 23 A sexy wife 26 A supportive wife 29 A grateful wife 34 Conclusion 39 About the Author 40 Introduction I’m done having fun. I want something serious. Why would a man write a book about how a woman can find a long-term companion? What can a man possibly know about women? If that’s your first concern I will not invalidate it here. There’s a good chance you are right. What a man does know is other men. What do men want […] - [From the book 'Live your Life as a Man'](https://coachdebruyns.com/from-the-book-live-your-life-as-a-man/): You must arrive at that truth authentically and within your being. If you are a praying man, then you should seek God’s help in finding your way through life. - [Why the mating dance goes wrong](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-mating-dance-gone-wrong/): Over millions of years of evolution and for the first time in modern history we’ve experienced an unprecedented change in the variables we need to negotiate in order to have a viable relationship. Couples can now negotiate whether or not they’re going to have children. Who is going to be the primary breadwinner and primary care-giver. How their careers will unfold and who will play the support role and during which time, or whether or not they will adhere to any particular religion, rules or regulations. There is so much to negotiate and naturally negotiations can more easily go wrong than […] - [What men don’t like in a long-term relationship](https://coachdebruyns.com/what-men-dont-like/): Today even mentioning the idea that woman can do things to keep their husbands happy is considered misogynistic. The focus is usually on what men can do to keep their wives happy. - [We provide you Motivational career coaching](https://coachdebruyns.com/we-provide-you-motivational-career-coaching/): Welcome to Previews Sites. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start writing! - [The Future: virtual reality and life coaches techniques](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-future-virtual-reality-and-life-coaches-techniques/): Welcome to Previews Sites. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start writing! - [Prayer](https://coachdebruyns.com/prayer/): There are days when I find myself praying profusely and then there are days that I pray at a bare minimum. Sometimes the intimacy of God is craved and sought after, other times it is simply enough to acknowledge God as real. Prayer is one of the best ways to acknowledge the reality of God because asking precludes that the one being asked is capable of giving.  One of the amazing things about prayer, seeking assistance from God, is that you are able to acknowledge your heartfelt desires to yourself. Prayer shows you how vulnerable and needy you are and helps […] - [The you that you’ll become](https://coachdebruyns.com/the-you-that-youll-become/): Being yourself isn’t about what you do, it’s about who you are in any given situation. It’s about who you are when you surf, run or hangout. Find out more about who you are and understand that that you is what matters.  - [Is Gender a thing?](https://coachdebruyns.com/is-gender-a-thing/): I am a man, and I'm proud to be one. - [Boundaries in Relationships](https://coachdebruyns.com/boundaries-in-relationships/): I remember the days when I would see a really beautiful woman, let’s a say a 10 out of 10, go up to her and try to start a conversation with her. I would say, “Hi, how are you?” She’d reply, “fine.” I’d say, what’s your name, she’d say, “Anna.” I’d be like, “what are you doing?” She’d be like, “nothing.” I’d get stuck and get the message. This girl doesn’t want to talk. She either doesn’t want to talk because she’s already seeing someone, or because she’s so used to guys trying to talk to her that she’s just sick […] - [A short break from Social Media is important.](https://coachdebruyns.com/hello-world-2/): Welcome to Previews Sites. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start writing! - [Men should respect themselves and maybe women too](https://coachdebruyns.com/men-should-respect-themselves/): I spent the last few weeks travelling, locked away in quarantine and now back in my beautiful country I’ve finally had a breather and decided to switch on the TV for background noise. I opened whatever was at hand on Netflix and let it play only half paying attention. Something then grabbed my attention. A guy called the girl he  had a hook up with, meant only to be a once off one night stand (Ameicans, what can I say), and she had already forgotten his name. He was like, “Oh that’s ok…” I was like… Wait wait … What? How […] - [What does fasting in Ramadan teach us?](https://coachdebruyns.com/what-does-fasting-in-ramadan-teach-us/): In the name of God the Most Gracious the Most Merciful The Praise belongs to God though I am incapable of praising Him such as He deserves, and prayers, salutations, pledges and support on Muhammad the son of Abudllah (s) on his family, friends and helpers.  Every year we encounter the holy month of Ramadan in which we resolve to fast during the daylight hours keeping away from food, drink and sex. We do it year in and year out in keeping with the religion of Islam. What does fasting teach us? What are we supposed to take away when the […] ## Pages - [My account](https://coachdebruyns.com/my-account/) - [Checkout](https://coachdebruyns.com/checkout/) - [Cart](https://coachdebruyns.com/cart/) - [Shop](https://coachdebruyns.com/shop/) - [Links to Books](https://coachdebruyns.com/links-to-books/): How to Choose and Keep a Wife https://www.powells.com/book/how-to-choose-and-keep-a-wife-a-marriage-guide-for-men-9798873128297?srsltid=AfmBOopZm5S0v9cktqDO04_wpPhZsFllZXfDoWvEkQVzbt-T5ro2-WJh https://www.bol.com/nl/nl/p/how-to-choose-and-keep-a-wife/9300000172685569 https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/how-to-choose-and-keep-a-wife-a-marriage-guide-for-men_coach-de-bruyns/52198590/#edition=70872913&idiq=63289986 https://www.thriftbooks.com/w/how-to-choose-and-keep-a-wife-a-marriage-guide-for-men_coach-de-bruyns/52198590 https://www.powells.com/book/how-to-choose-and-keep-a-wife-a-marriage-guide-for-men-9798873128297 https://www.bol.com/nl/nl/p/how-to-choose-and-keep-a-wife/9300000172685569 Live Your Life as a Man https://www.foyles.co.uk/book/live-your-life-as-a-man/coach-de-bruyns/9798409340216 https://www.bol.com/be/fr/p/live-your-life-as-a-man/9300000127955795 https://product.kyobobook.co.kr/detail/S000200753535 Polygyny Maybe Not https://bookscape.com/product-details/polygyny-maybe-not-a-guide-to-monogamy-9798215576960 https://www.walmart.com/ip/Polygyny-Maybe-Not-A-Guide-to-Monogamy-Paperback-9798215576960/5245295420 https://www.worten.pt/produtos/livro-polygyny-maybe-not-a-guide-to-monogamy-de-coach-de-bruyns-ingles-mrkean-9798215576960 https://www.takealot.com/polygyny-maybe-not-a-guide-to-monogamy/PLID94070095 Polygyny Maybe www.goodreads.com/book/show/60728220-polygyny-maybe https://www.ebay.com/itm/365923189625 https://www.waterstones.com/book/polygyny-maybe-a-practical-guide-to-polygyny/coach-de-bruyns/9798223148234 https://www.indigo.ca/en-ca/polygyny-maybe-a-practical-guide-to-polygyny/9798223148234.html https://www.worten.pt/produtos/livro-polygyny-maybe-not-a-guide-to-monogamy-de-coach-de-bruyns-ingles-mrkean-9798215576960 The Terrorist Next Door https://books.apple.com/ie/book/the-terrorist-next-door-hate-at-first-sight/id6446440744 https://www.everand.com/book/632135529/The-Terrorist-Next-Door-Hate-at-first-Sight-1-1 https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-terrorist-next-door-coach-de-bruyns/1143230934 https://www.indigo.ca/en-ca/the-terrorist-next-door-hate-at-first-sight-1-1/a1e23943-2d50-3254-8910-49f0aff67726.html https://www.ibs.it/terrorist-next-door-hate-at-ebook-inglese-coach-de-bruyns/e/9798215779422?srsltid=AfmBOoq066eFjLQ2WwkMstUL8E6CnYCKOqUFwbomYuxLZT6JIU85tz4Q https://www.fnac.com/ia10921488/Coach-De-Bruyns https://www.adlibris.com/fi/kirja/terrorist-next-door-hate-at-first-sight-9798215779422 https://www.indigo.ca/fr-ca/the-terrorist-next-door-hate-at-first-sight-1-1/a1e23943-2d50-3254-8910-49f0aff67726.html The Terrorist Next Door- Prison Sentence www.waterstones.com/book/the-terrorist-next-door/coach-de-bruyns/9798215123447 https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-terrorist-next-door-coach-de-bruyns/1144529462 https://www.worten.pt/produtos/livro-the-terrorist-next-door-prison-sentence-de-coach-de-bruyns-ingles-mrkean-9798432061775 https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/146888864215 https://www.kobo.com/lu/fr/ebook/the-terrorist-next-door-prison-sentence https://business.walmart.com/ip/1-The-Terrorist-Next-Door-Paperback-9798215123447/5328464509 https://www.tw.coupang.com/products/(%E5%A4%96%E6%96%87%E6%9B%B8)-The-Terrorist-Next-Door%3A-Prison-Sentence-Paperback–Independently-Published–English-21007807355137 - [Books of Interest](https://coachdebruyns.com/books-of-interest/) - [Paperbacks](https://coachdebruyns.com/paperbacks/): These are my listings on Amazon: - [Videos](https://coachdebruyns.com/videos/): Here you can find some videos related to discussions from my published works: Bestsellers - [Blog](https://coachdebruyns.com/blog/) - [Contact](https://coachdebruyns.com/contact/) - [About](https://coachdebruyns.com/about/): I first started coaching in 2006 as a young aspiring leader in a local community. At the time, it was largely informal. Eventually, I went on to start an internet cafe, where I became more established in my coaching business, along with various business services I ran. Over the years, I’ve realized that there is a crisis in masculinity and that more than anyone, men specifically needed support to realize their great potential in their careers, lives, marriages, and families. I now focus mainly on coaching men to take control of their lives, to embrace patriarchal norms, polygyny (if they so […] - [Home](https://coachdebruyns.com/): This is an example page. It’s different from a blog post because it will stay in one place and will show up in your site navigation (in most themes). Most people start with an About page that introduces them to potential site visitors. It might say something like this: Hi there! I’m a bike messenger by day, aspiring actor by night, and this is my website. I live in Los Angeles, have a great dog named Jack, and I like piña coladas. (And gettin’ caught in the rain.) …or something like this: The XYZ Doohickey Company was founded in 1971, and […] ## Products - [Elite Plan](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/elite-plan/): Six coaching sessions One hour per session Follow-up emails Texting within the 30-day window. - [Premium Plan](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/premium-plan/): Three coaching sessions within the period of 30 days. Each session is for one hour. Follow-up emails and text. - [Polygyny Maybe? A Practical Guide Audio Book](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/polygyny-maybe-a-practical-guide-audio-book/): Discover the truth about polygyny and unlock a fulfilling, traditional lifestyle with Polygyny Maybe? A Practical Guide to Polygyny by Coach De Bruyns. This no-nonsense guide offers men and women a clear, practical roadmap to understanding and navigating polygynous relationships in today’s world.Are you curious about polygyny but overwhelmed by myths and misconceptions? Coach De Bruyns, a trusted voice in masculinity and traditional family values, breaks down the essentials with clarity and confidence. Inside, you’ll find: Step-by-step guidance on building and sustaining a polygynous household with harmony and respect. Practical strategies for addressing common challenges, from communication to financial planning. Real-world insights into fostering strong, committed relationships rooted in traditional principles. Answers to tough questions, like how to choose compatible partners and navigate societal perceptions. Whether you’re exploring polygyny for the first time or seeking to deepen your understanding, this book empowers you to create a thriving, purpose-driven family structure. With Coach De Bruyns’ straightforward advice, you’ll gain the tools to make informed decisions and embrace polygyny with confidence.Why Choose Polygyny Maybe? Written by an experienced author with a passion for traditional relationships. Packed with actionable advice for men and women committed to intentional living. Perfect for readers interested in masculinity, family dynamics, and alternative relationship models. Take the first step toward a bold, fulfilling lifestyle. Grab your copy of Polygyny Maybe? today and start building the family you envision! - [Testing a New Business](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/testing-a-new-business/): Book this session if you want to discuss a new business that you’d like to launch and you don’t know which steps to take first. As a person who has owned and established several businesses, I am happy to help you get started.     - [How to Choose and Keep a Wife: A Practical Guide for Men (eBook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/how-to-choose-and-keep-a-wife-a-practical-guide-for-men-ebook/): How to Choose and Keep a Wife is a much needed and in demand marriage guide for men in a time when marriages are just not working. This book doesn't aim to fix the problems of women, or the problems with society. Rather, this book gives men a step by step guide on how to properly vet a woman for marriage. It also gives men clear guidance on how to manage being married and staying married. While some might see this book as idealistic, there is something in it for everyone. It tackles the issues of marriage both from an idealistic and pragmatic approach. On the one hand, the author sets forth an ideal but also acknowledges the real likelihood that the ideal will not be accomplished and gives practical advice on how to manoeuvre in less idealistic circumstances. Even though the target audience for this book is single men or men who are married and are having a hard time, it would prove useful for women who are looking at being good wives. GET IT ON AMAZON - [The Terrorist Next Door: Prison Sentence (eBook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/the-terrorist-next-door-prison-sentence-ebook/): After Fatima's arrest, the battle against the legal system begins. Discover what Fatima's life in prison is like and how she deals with some of the challenges she faces. Meanwhile, on the outside, things get a bit rough as the family struggle to come to terms with how events have unfolded. A harrowing tale of one woman's struggle for justice against a corrupt prison system in the midst of an ideological battle between Western hegemony and Islam. Having been wrongfully incarcerated, Fatima fights for her life in prison. You can also buy the hardcopy on Amazon - [Polygyny Maybe Not?: A Guide to Monogamy (eBook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/polygyny-maybe-not-a-guide-to-monogamy-ebook/): Polygyny isn’t for everyone. The first handbook I wrote was for people who were interested in practicing polygyny. It was called, ‘Polygyny Maybe?’ Some of my readers who bought my previous book, told me that I discouraged them from practicing polygyny and that they decided it was not for them. However, since I seemed to be suggesting that polygyny is the most natural mating system for human beings, was it at all possible to be truly monogamous? How would one best uphold the Christian marriage vows of “Until death do us part?” This book is an attempt to answer that question. I will look at the importance of raising good children who will be capable of monogamy and how best to choose a suitable monogamous mate. Finally, I will teach you how to stay faithful within your monogamous marriage. - [The Terrorist Next Door: Hate at First Sight (ebook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/the-terrorist-next-door-hate-at-first-sight-ebook/): The Terrorist Next Door is a fiction about Jack's new neighbors who happen to be Moslems. In his attempt to be patriotic Jack finds out interesting things about his neighbors thinking that he would keep the homeland safe. However, in the process he finds himself conflicted between his stereotypes and his new found 'friends.' This motivates him to improve his own life and in the process becomes the man he never thought he could be. The Terrorist Next Door is the first in a series of books I intend on writing following along the same theme. It highlights the various cultural nuances amongst various people within the landscape of the post-modern world. Although this book is a fiction, it is geared towards transforming lives for the better. It comes in a two part series. - [IT IS WHAT IT IS: Coach De Bruyns' Philosophy in a Nutshell (eBook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/it-is-what-it-is-coach-de-bruyns-philosophy-in-a-nutshell-ebook/): What is the nature of existence? What does that question even mean? Existence of what? Of who? Let’s try to get to the heart of the matter and aim to describe the nature of nature. In other words, the nature of everything. What is the underlying condition of everything in existence? What is its inherent goal? What is it trying to achieve? Why is it trying to achieve it? What is it? This book will be an exposition on everything functionally relevant in a concise format. Everything in the world of writing today seems to be long and drawn out. Unless you don’t have better things to do, it is a waste of your time. Time is all you have, so it is my promise that I will do my best to spare you unnecessary details and tell you exactly what is really going on everywhere and with everything. In order to explore the questions above we need to make no assumptions and start from what we know for sure. I will relate some of the points I make to common realities that people are generally aware of in their lives. Hopefully you will gain an understanding of life’s ecosystem and decide how best you fit into it. ORDER THE PAPERBACK ON AMAZON   - [Polygyny Maybe? (ebook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/polygyny-maybe-ebook/): Do you want another wife? Are you a woman having an affair with a married man? Why not make it legitimate? This is a short and useful digital book you can get and share with your friends. Buy the paperback on AMAZON Get the audiobook HERE   - [A Guide on How to Get and Keep a Man (eBook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/a-guide-on-how-to-get-and-keep-a-man-ebook/): I want a man who will love me, cherish me, honour me, and most importantly… I want a man who will commit. I want a man who will look after me, protect me, help me, and sometimes spoil me. I want a man who won’t cheat on me and who I can grow old with. That’s the man I want. That’s the man I don’t think I can get.  What You’ll Discover Inside Using a compelling fictional story of “Linda” — a smart, attractive, career-driven woman who keeps ending up alone despite sleeping with plenty of men — the book illustrates exactly why so many good women stay single or end up heartbroken.Then comes the meat: the 7 Key Qualities high-value men actually look for in a wife they want to keep forever. These aren’t the fluffy magazine lists. These are what real men respect, desire, and commit to: Chaste – Why low body count (or virginity) dramatically increases your value and ability to pair-bond deeply. Feminine – How to be agreeable, soft, and supportive so he feels like the leader (exactly what strong men crave). Pleasant – Mastering the art of long-term seduction and never becoming complacent once he commits. Responsible – No more entitlement. How to pull your weight and make him feel the relationship is a true team. Sexy – How to be enthusiastically available and satisfying in private (without the Madonna-Whore trap). Supportive – Becoming his biggest cheerleader instead of his critic so he never wants to leave. Grateful – Ditching impossible checklists and appreciating the man who chooses you, making him feel like a king. - [Live Your Life as a Man (eBook)](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/live-your-life-as-a-man-ebook/): This book is meant to help men live their lives authentically. There is a crisis of masculinity in the world and very few people out there have a balanced solution to the problem. This book attempts to give a balanced solution. You can order the paper back version and have it mailed to you here.   - [Can't find a husband?](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/cant-find-a-husband/): Women often struggle to find the perfect match. It can be difficult and worrying. Added to that stress is that loud ticking of your biological clock! Will you be able to have children? Should you just grab the next guy and settle? What should you do? How do you find love? How do you find a man who will finally stick around? Let's have that conversation. PAPERBACKS LISTED ON AMAZON How to Get and Keep a Wife: A Marriage Guide For Men||Polygyny Maybe? A Practical Guide to Polygyny||Live Your Life As a Man: Reclaim Your Masculinity ||IT IS WHAT IT IS: Coach De Bruyn’s Philosophy in a Nutshell||Polygyny Maybe Not?: A Guide to Monogamy||Get and Keep a Man: A Long-term Relationship Perspective||The Terrorist Next Door: Hate At First Sight||The Terrorist Next Door: Prison Sentence - [Weight Loss](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/weight-loss/): You may ask how an online session will help you with losing weight. That's a very important question. I found that people gain weight for various reasons that are sometimes not related to their physical realities but rather it can be related to their emotional condition. Sometimes gaining weight is a symptom of being lonely or depressed. Other times it really is just poor diet or lack of exercise. In this session we will talk about your lifestyle as well as the things that make you happy and sad. We will look at your relationships with others, with food, and most importantly, we will look at the relationship you have with yourself. You will find that when we have uncovered some of what you struggle with, things will become easier and you will progress! Once you've booked us, we will send you a link to choose an appropriate date and time. - [Polygyny Coaching](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/polygyny-coaching/): Get expert advice on how to deal with your polygynous marriage or before you embark on one. Save yourself a lifetime of heartache with my expert advice. Don't listen to people who haven't experienced the lifestyle and only have theoretical knowledge. Learn from the experiences of others. Only by appointment. - [Relationship Coaching](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/relationship-coaching/): What am I here for? I'm here to listen to the areas in which you feel you are struggling and make suggestions on how you can improve your relationships based on the information you give me. I can speak to both or all parties who are willing to participate. Sometimes women want me to talk to unwilling husbands, or husbands to unwilling wives. We will have to work out what's the best way we can go about that! I do one session with two participants if needed. Sometimes I will request to speak to each person individually. I also have extensive experiences with polygyny and I work with men and women who are in that arrangement. - [Basic Plan One-on-one session](https://coachdebruyns.com/product/basic-plan/): In this session, we will get to know each other and discover how best to help you become the best version of yourself. Once you've booked, you will receive a confirmation email where you can select an appropriate time and date. ## Optional - [Agent (MCP protocol)](websites-agents.hostinger.com/coachdebruyns.com/mcp) [comment]: # (Generated by Hostinger Tools Plugin)