12 Reasons For Polygyny

Get Yourself Another Wife

Coach De Bruyns  – 4 January 2026 

 Introduction

Over the many years I’ve advocated for polygyny and practiced it, I’ve consistently gotten a dearth of opposition from all over the world. I’ve gotten opposition from Christians, Muslims, Jews, Hindus, Atheists, Feminists and even so called traditional men and women. I’ve been shadow banned, blocked, silenced and even threatened. I’ve lost friends along the way whose wives would rather not have their husband associate with a man who says it’s good to have more than one wife. In the midst of all this unrelenting opposition I have remained steadfast. I could just keep quiet and live my polygynous life to the end of my days and never be evangelical about it. I could say, “each to his own” and walk away form this debate. I could, but I won’t. I won’t because I’m right, and why should the truth be silenced with it is truth that will set you free? I do this as my form of charity. I do this because I’d like to see a better world. A world where whoredom is not the order of the day, and where families are respected, honored and preserved instead of broken apart by needless divorce and ridiculous expectations. 

What are those ridiculous expectations? Well, to begin with monogamy is a ridiculous expectation. Most people are only semi monogamous, or they practice serial monogamy. The ideal is maintained by less than 20% of the population who report having only had sex with one person (monogamy). According to the CDC’s National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG, 2015–2019, ages 25–49, sexually experienced adults):

• Overall: Approximately 14% (averaged across genders).
• Women: 17.7%.
• Men: 11.2%

(https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/nsfg/key_statistics/n-keystat.htm)

Naturally, if we must look at that stat and narrow it down for ages 40 and upwards it would be far less. By then the 25 year olds’ would have possibly exited the monogamy bracket. How can you base your morality on an exception? How can the gap between what is morally correct and what is natural result in 80% of all people falling short? The word we’re looking for is hypocrisy. There are more people in the 5- 9 partner range than in the one partner range according to the stats. Now ask yourself, what is more natural? Is it what people actually do or what we think people ought to do? 

Hold on a minute Coach De Bruyns! Are you condoning promiscuity? That’s what I get all the time! No, I’m not. It is precisely because I don’t condone promiscuity that I argue in favor of polygyny. If every man married the women he slept with then we’d find the first bracket of people having only one partner much bigger, and the lower brackets of people having multiple partners much smaller. Simply put, only men who can afford multiple wives would be sleeping with multiple women they KEEP, and not multiple women that are passed around the proverbial room. It is precisely because we DON’T practice polygyny that we have high body counts and rampant promiscuity. 

What about jealousy? Isn’t it hard for multiple women to share the same husband? Yes, it can be. But then women are sharing the same men whether they like it or not even now. The only difference is that those men don’t have any responsibility or obligation towards those women. You can imagine if 80% of people have more than one sexual partner, then most people are sharing. The difference? Sexual communism breaks down society and increases the spread of STD’s. Polygyny? It’s one man with several women. It’s a closed loop. Let’s do an experiment: If person A sleeps with person B, and person B sleeps with person C, and person C sleeps with person A, and person A sleeps with person D etc, and each person sleeps with ten people on average as per our data then how many people are sharing each other’s DNA? Do you know the answer? Here’s our calculation using Grok:

A simple mathematical model for this scenario treats the sexual network as a tree (ignoring overlaps and cycles for simplification), where each person has 10 partners on average. This approximates the rapid growth in indirect connections (“sharing DNA”) through degrees of separation. We assume a branching factor of 9 new partners per level (subtracting 1 for the connection back to the previous level).

The cumulative number of people connected up to depth (d) (degrees of separation) is given by:

That’s close to 700 000 people sharing DNA with you in your serial monogamy relationships of up to six partners. 

Let’s do another experiment. If all women only slept with one man, even if some men had several women, how many people would share each other’s DNA? 

This one should be easy. We don’t need Grok to solve it. If a man has 4 wives, then the maximum DNA sharing is 5. The man and his wife. It will technically never be 700 000. That’s the difference. It also will make it impossible for people to sleep with hundreds of women because there just won’t be hundreds of women available. 

To conclude our introduction to the topic lets ask Grok one more question:

If every man marries the woman he sleeps with, and a man can not sleep with a married woman, then how what would be the body count for each woman?

Response:

The rules imply a system where sexual activity occurs only before or at the point of marriage, with no adultery allowed. Specifically:

• A man can only sleep with an unmarried woman.
• Upon sleeping with her, he must marry her.
• Once married, she is off-limits to other men.

This setup allows for polygyny (one man marrying multiple women), but each woman can only ever sleep with one man—her husband—because after marriage, no other man can sleep with her. Therefore, the body count (lifetime sexual partners) for each woman is exactly 1.

Men’s body counts would vary: 0 for unmarried men with no partners, 1 for monogamous husbands, or more for polygynous husbands. But the question focuses solely on women.

Is this all just hypothetical? Well, No. We have actual statistics regarding this system already, straight from Utah:

The average reported lifetime number of sexual partners (often referred to as “body count”) in Utah is 2.6, the lowest among U.S. states according to a 2018 Superdrug Online Doctor survey of over 1,000 American adults. This figure is commonly attributed to the state’s large Mormon (LDS Church) population—over 60% of residents—which promotes premarital chastity and marital monogamy for women, contributing to lower rates of multiple partners compared to the national U.S. average of 7.2.

Polygyny is frankly the only way back to morality. You cannot have sexual fidelity in a world that does not also embrace polygyny. Will everyone be polygynous? Like not. However, those men equipped for polygyny would do the world a lot of good when they MARRY WOMEN, instead of simply sleeping around with everyone’s future wife. That creates a lot of problems in society in and of itself. In this article we will discuss 12 reasons outside of the number I just cited in this introduction as to why we should ACCEPT polygyny.

REASON #1

IT PROTECTS FAMILIES

Sex isn’t just something that takes place between two people. It’s something that makes people family of each other. The man you sleep with has a mother and father who are now spiritually and genetically tied to you. The woman you sleep with has sisters and brothers who are now your siblings. This is the case whether or not you’ve legally married each other. Having sex with a woman and her sister, or a woman and her mother, is still called incest, even in modern legal systems. Let’s say you had sex with a woman, and later you have sex with another woman, and the latter woman is the daughter of the former. You’ve just engaged in incest. You’ve also blurred the lines of what constitutes natural family. How many mother-in-laws do you have when you slept with a hundred women? You are now part of them and they are part of you, whether you like it or not. 

In order to safeguard society sexual relationships must come with the conscious knowledge that it CANNOT be secret. You can’t have sex secretly because it’s consequences are public. Polygyny is just that. It is the accepted public practice of men sleeping with multiple women while acknowledging the natural consequences of such relations. It’s the opposite of chaos. It the ownership and acknowledgement of your actions. Such actions can only be owned if it is legitimized. When there is no stigma against it and when it’s not a crime, there will be greater honesty and therefore greater accountability in society. 

In order to regulate society there must be a public record of people’s sexual relations. If we know a man is with a certain number of women who can hold him responsible for them. If we know that a particular woman is with a particular man we can expect not to see her going on dates with other men. Societal governance through shaming and social coercion is necessary for society to remain decent. It can only remain decent when polygyny is accepted because without it the alternative is promiscuity. 

REASON #2

IT PROTECTS CHILDREN

When we talk about marriage, we normally think of a man and a woman. We rarely talk about the rights of children. How many children grow up never knowing who their fathers are? What are the effects of never knowing who your father is? What are the impacts on society? What is the cause of so many single-mother homes? I will set out to answer these critical questions and demonstrate how polygyny solves most of these problems.

Children are tribal. They want to know where they come from and who they belong to. When a child only knows its mother, it has half of the equation. What about the other half? I once had a young man work for me in my Internet cafe. He was in his mid-twenties, trying to make a life for himself. Almost every day, he spoke about how he wished he could meet his father. The fact that he never knew him haunted him for his entire life. Not only did it haunt him, but it showed on his character. He struggled to be responsible and to live a decent life. He was often drunk, and he was a notorious womanizer. Eventually, I had no choice but to fire him. That’s anecdotal, you might say. Well, what does the data show? 

According to the most recent available data from 2023, approximately 22% of children under age 18 in the United States live with their mother only (no father present), which equates to about 16 million children based on a total child population of roughly 73 million. This figure has remained relatively stable in recent years; for comparison, it was also 22% in 2022.

Who are those women who look after their kids without the father present? They comprise of women who had casual sex and wasn’t thinking of the consequences and women who were married and got divorced. Which set of women would make up the majority of single mothers? Can you take a guess? The previously married or the blatantly irresponsible? 

According to the statistics, 51.4% of single mothers have never married, 29.3% are divorced, and 19.2% are either separated or widowed. It wasn’t hard to guess that most single mothers have never been married. Whereas only 29.3% are officially divorced. How can we interpret that? How does that relate to polygyny? To answer that, we’d have to examine the behavior of the people involved and their reasons for having sex.

The first set of women who have never been married likely had sex with men who would either go on to have sex with several other women or already had sex with other women. In other words, most of those men could be disqualified from real monogamy. However, if those same men were open to polygyny and believed in it, as I am proposing, would all those women still be single? What we can argue is that less of them would be single if the men who like variety were held to account and it was within the culture that they MUST marry those women. 

Polygyny addresses this directly by allowing responsible men to marry multiple wives, ensuring that children from these unions have a present father and stable family structure. In societies where polygyny is practiced, such as parts of Africa, it often leads to better child outcomes: Polygynous households can provide enhanced economic support, better access to food, healthier children, and stronger social networks during hardships. This reduces the isolation of single motherhood, minimizes father absence, and protects children from the proven risks of poverty, behavioral issues, and societal strain. By culturally enforcing marriage for all sexual partnerships, polygyny holds men accountable, fills the “other half” of a child’s identity, and fosters tribal belonging—ultimately safeguarding the next generation.

To be continued…..

https://www.childstats.gov/americaschildren23/family1.asp

https://hereisshannon.medium.com/single-mother-households-are-not-the-problem-986702024da9

https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2015/10/151029102240.htm